I've been engaged in a couple of flame wars on MuseCube (http:\\www.musecube.com) with what I can only characterize as a sociopath. Sometimes people get me going and this fellow certainly has the ability to make me want to write. Fortunately quite a few others share my opinion and have been very supportive.

I don't want to sound like I'm on a lone crusade. He's at war with everyone and I just took a piece of the action, got my shots in an dtook a few before the thread got deleted by the management.

My office is pretty much together. I still need to put in some shelving above the desk. That could come together over the weekend.

I'd thought for several days that I'd lost the self-portrait of dad from the late 1930s. I searched everywhere including the old place (being the last place I can recall seeing the painting). I was in a panic and heart broken as I prepared to accept that the painting had been lost to the ages. What a relief to find it packed with several other things.

We've listed the old house. It should go on the market for much more than we expected. It will be windfall and pay down the loan on this place to a very manageable level.

We have been very lucky with the buying and selling of homes since we started in NJ. A quick calculation suggests that we've lived pretty much for free, having made far more on the sales than we had on the table with the purchases. It seems our luck is holding and for the third house in 7-8 years the real estate agent is telling us our timing is impeccable. We have consistantly made more on the houses than it has cost us to pay the mortgages. It's not showing up in the cash flow but it sure helps the net worth.

It seems there's always one loose cannon rolling around the decks of MuseCube. The current incarnation prompted me to post the suggestion that folks ought to do a Googel search on the word "sociopath". Thought he calls himself InAFlash I think I'm going to start calling him FlashInThePan. That should stimulate some conversation.

Jackie and Ray came for dinner. I think they enjoyed themselves - in spite of the fact that Ray and I have so little common ground. He even complimented me on my office. I thought that was a very positive thing!

I have a sense of mild foreboding, it seems. I think more often about death and dyeing than I like to admit -- certainly more than I've admitted to anyone standing. I found the picture of mom and me, taken the month before she passed away --- actually, probably closer to two weeks before she died. She looks so small and frail.

I think often of my father, too. Frequently I ponder the thought that all of those things that were so important to him while he was alive instantly became useless baggage once he passed away. I imagine that will be the fate of all the things I consider important, as well.

This year has not bee a kind year in the market. I'm looking at losses of around $36K with they year more than half over. Fortunately there's enough ballast that there are no direct ill effects. There is also the fact that last year was exceptionally good, showing significantly more profit than this year is showing losses, leaving me ahead of the plan for the last two years. Sometimes you have to take the long view to make things look good.

It's sunrise in Arizona. I can see the sun just starting to break over the horizon in the east. I've been up since about 2:30AM, unable to sleep ... Not an event so much as "situation normal".

I remember when I used to hand write my diary in spiral bound notebooks. When I sat down to the task, it seems I would write for pages. I've not recaptured that fascination with detail. Perhaps it's just that I'm out of practice. Perhaps it's because there is a sense with blogs that someone might actually read what is written. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact it's easier to find things to write about when things are going badly that when there are moving along smoothly. I don't know what the answer is ... Perhaps even a combination of those factors plus something else I've not considered. No matter.

We will be listing the other house (9902) shortly. We have an appointment with Mary to go over the paperwork -- primarily the disclosure form -- and sign off on her representation in the sale. I'm ready to be done with the place and to pay down the loans on this place as well. Thought the rates are favorable and the fact that we're only paying interest for the time being makes the bill manageable, I think we'll both be far happier when the amounts are negligible. I hope the sale goes quickly. We are anticipating getting more for the house than we'd ever imagined. I guess that's the effect of all those Californians moving here to the Tucson area and pumping up the property values.

Where do they work? Do they work? Or did the simply bring wealth with them? Tucson is very much a blie collar town as far as I can see. There are veery few opportunities. Yet there are communities with $500,000 homes springing up all over the map. A million four is not a strange number. We see listings for homes at that level all the time.

The book cases are together and in place. I'm done assembling until candy gets her cabinets for the sewing room. I've got most of the books in the book cases and even organized by an almost system of free association. Candy says they look good. (I honestly thought she's think they're just clutter but, I was wrong!)

I have a ton of CD's put away. I'm surprised at how many of them are Candy's. I think she's been buying them when I'm not looking!

Jackie and Ray (Wackie and Jay) are coming tomorrow for dinner (about 3-ish). The house looks great and I think Candy wants to show off a little. For as big as the place is, it's still cozy. I have a bunch of the paintings and prints hung. I honestly hope they're blown away.

I get interesting and unexpected notes in e-mail. This most recent one is from a photographer in the St. Louis area:

Hi Joe

We haven't met, I hope someday we might. You have critiqued Photos for a very good friend of mine, Sharon Spear, a couple of which were taken by me, like a dummy I had not the sense to thank you. So thank you for your time & kind comments.

When I first saw the photo of you on the Wicker settee my first thought were of a very good friend of mine, the 2nd was of Hemmingway.

I have one question, at what point does one become a GWC? I may have reached that status.

Take care
Frank

Sometimes I actually think I do some things right. Praise is always a good tonic. It seems, in my case, the effects don't last very long.

Of course, I have to answer Frank:

Hi Frank –

What a nice note to be confronted by first thing in the morning!

No thanks are necessary. It’s so rare that anyone actively solicits my opinion that the flattery of the request has been enough to get me through the day. (Have you ever noticed that on most occasions when someone asks for your opinion, what they really want is your unconditional support?)

Speaking of flattering, I’m quite pleased that I remind you of a friend (though any comparison to Hemingway might be a little over the top).

As for GWC* status, if you think you’re there, you’re there. The real qualifier is a certain world-weariness brought on the lengthy diatribes and pompous posturing of so called “pros” who spend a lifetime photographing naked women “for the sake of art” while denying the sheer pleasure of hanging out with naked women has anything to do with it. They probably buy Ploughboy for the articles, too! If you’re prepared to admit there’s something elementally kewl (“cool” to old farts like me) about having women slip out of their panties simply because you’re waving a camera around – welcome to the club! Of course, that some decent pictures come out of it is hardly beside the point.

Regards,
Joe

I've been assembling bookcases for the last couple of days. I tire easily so I'm moving along at a rate of one bookcase per day - one more to go. I've started hauling books up to my office, too. It's so wonderful to have access to them. It's been over a year since we packed them in Pennsylvania and now they're finding homes on some very nice looking shelves.

I like this house. I think I like this house better than any house I've ever lived in. Maybe I will develop that sense of it being home. I certainly hope so. It's been a lifetime since I felt like I was "home".

* GWC; Guy with a Camera. A term that most often refers to quasi-photographers with "point-and-shoot" cameras who hire models in the hope of "copping a feel".

Slowly things are coming together with the house. We make daily comments to each other about how much we like being here. That's a good sign. I've slowly been hanging the framed things. It's like Christmas; seeing those things that have been packed awy for more than a year.

Ali called the day before yesterday. She's still trying to get her car back on the road after her fiasco of inattentiveness. I guess, in many ways, she's like me an dhas to learn things the hard way ... though I don't think I ever too as hard a route as she has.

Shooting Rodney went well. At least I thought it went well. Rodney grew up here in Tucson, but he'd never been to the Saguaro National Park. He was surprised to find there was a road that we could use to get around the lower portion at the foot of the Rincons.

We used the wash at the far northern end of the circuit and later the rock outcrop about 3/4 of the way around. We came away with about 130 frames ... some of them quite good.

Rodney arrived on Musecube about a month ago with a handful of web cam photographs of himself in his portfolio. No one took him seriously. However, he asked me very politely if I would work with him. Based on his civil approach I thought I'd take a flyer. Besides, I need more "people pictures" in my portfolio.

I put one of the images up in the Model Critique gallery on MuseCube. There have been two comments so far ... both, interestingly, from photographers I respect for their portfolios:

Comment by: Shadowscape (July 09, 2004)
Rated: 10

What the heck am I doing over in this section. Oh well....
You have an amazing way of capturing the everyday in a not so everyday fashion. You seem to see things the rest of us don't. Maybe we do, but do not see the potential in them the way you do.
Kudos my friend for treating the rushing world to what they are passing by at such high speed.

Comment by: Teez (July 09, 2004)
Rated: 10

I agree with the previous critiquer....your work is always an inspiration to view as well as thought provoking. My immediate thought when viewing this was..."what is he looking at? What is he thinking"?

Wonderful tones and lighting...love it...:)

Its very gratifying to have such positive comments.

I have the office hardware pretty well under control. Almost everything is working the way it should. Now it's time to work on the book cases. It'll be great to have the library back again. The books and art collection have been packed for over a year. Opening the cartons has been like Christmas - rediscovering the old and familiar things.

To quote Candy, "This is more like it."

New day, new opportunities. We're moved for the most part. There are still some things left at the other house, but we can take care of them easily.

We were without a cable hookup in my office over the holiday weekend. That has been remedied and I'm back in business.

I got a "hellooooo" from Roginski. He's resigned the bank and is now working with Eric at the brokerage.

We are fitting into the house quite nicely. I like the kitchen. I don't feel like I'm craawling around on the floor to get things out of cabinets or like I'm about to bump into somethihng if I turn around. The pool table fits where we'd hoped it would and, overall, the house is quite "showy"

---

I'll be shooting tomorrow. A male model named Rodney. I took the opportunty just to have a reason for shooting.

I've also been thinking about doing a send up of all the Travel Channel Grand Canyon stuff. I have a little artists manaquin that I want to take out into the desert and shoot in some "Perils of Pauline" situations ... and title the series "Bland Canyon"

MuseCube is getting less and less interesting. There are a couple of people who seem to have their heads screwed on straight but for the most part their a reflection of a miopic world. Does the word "petty" ring a bell? The world is made up of small minds and this bunch confuses "glamour" with something worth while.

I've posted pictures on MuseCube and I've expressed opinions - all in the hope that I was hanging about with like minded people. Reading this morning has put me off in the extreme. One photographer is attempting to make an artistic statement - and getting judged (or misjudged) by morons using inappropriate standards. Another photographer who's work I like removes a piece and resubmits because he doesn't like the comments - mine in particular, I think. :::shudder:::

Better, I think, to simply do my thing.

MSNBC - Altercation: "the most heartbreaking thing about F 9/11 is that we are now engaged in the national argument over a film that we should have had about going to war."

Sleep is not coming. It seems there are so many things to think about but really, there is nothing.

We spent a little time at the new house this evening. Ray and Jackie came by to take a look. I think I got Ray. He was coming down the stairs and noticed a light bulb was out in the fixture above the stairs. I told him I was going to wait for the rest of them to burn out and then hire out changing the bulbs. I'm sure he didn't kinow quite what to make of that.

Jackie went through the trash an dcame up with a couple of things she liked; a little carved wooden box and a metal heart for her grand daughter. Bernie is alove and well in his daughters. It's what Brenie would have done.

The place seems smaller than when we committed to it. I'm sure it's just a perception; maybe a little buyers remorse. It does not have the sweeping vistas I'd envisioned, but it does have views. The two bedrooms are going to be smaller than Candy wants to hoouse her office and the futon. The space is fine for me, but then I'm not trying to get dual usage out of them.

Candy will be using the loft for her quilting area. That looks to me to be a little on the small side, too. Have we settled for the smaller refrigerator solution?

We closed on the new house this morning. We found that the owners were further up the creek than we anticipated. According to the paperwork that I saw, they had to come up with about $10K in cash to sell the house. (We had to come up with nothing, zero, zip, zilch.) Candy speculates they're in the midst of a divorce. Why else would they have settled on a house here in Tucson while he hasn't decided on which of two job offers he wants to take ... One in Boston, the other in San Diego? He bought her a house. Simple as that.

The packers come tomorrow. The truck comes on Wednesday and then we're out of here.

There are still some issues with the house:

1. The drip irrigation system is still leaking like there's no tomorrow
   
2. We have no idea how to arm and use the security system
   
3. The blind in the living room is stuck
   
4. We don't have the code for the garage key pad
   

But the hell with it all. None of it real matters. All of those items are just inconveniences. And, oh by the way, one of the bulbs over the stairway is burned out.

I'd planned to go up to Chaco Canyon in the fall however, we've never been to Canyon de Chelly. That might make an interesting destination - and I think it's probably a good idea to make the rounds before repeating ourselves.

Canyon de Chelly is about an hour closer and we could still arrange to meet Magoski and anyone else who wants to tip a round in Gallup, NM. Gallup is the logical hotel point in any case. It's about 7-7 1/2 hours up the road from here - shorter time, more miles if by Interstate; more time, fewer miles on the straight line.

I haven't decided if I want to have a model hang out to add human scale to the images. Actually, the more time I think about it, the less I like the idea. The ruins shold be enough subject matter in themselves.

It's early on Sunday morning now. On Friday we had an adrenalin rush. We got a call from the mortgage guy telling us that the underwriters at the loan office needed a guarantee that I would have my Ricoh income after December when my contract expires. I could only tell them the truth, there is no guarantee.

"Well, can they call your contact in New Jersey."

"Of Course they can."

"Will he tell them your contract will be renewed."

"He'll tell them that the odds are very good, like 99.99%"

"Will he put that on paper."

"No. He would be representing the company and the company will not commit beyond the contract. If they were to commit beyond the contract, that would be a contract, and we don't have a contract for that period of time. We won't have a contract covering that period of time until we negotiate it sometime in October or November. In the meantime, I have almost four times the value of the house 'in the bank'. I'm only looking to finance the house until I can sell our current house in August and I'm only holding back on that to avoid the capital gains hit. You tell those morons in underwriting that if worse comes to worse, I'll buy the god damned house with cash and leave the bank out of the picture. Ask them what guarantee they have with their job beyond next week. I'm better off than an employee. I have a contract that covers the next six months. What are their friggin' guarantees? I'm a lot harder to get rid of than they are."

The upshot is that after the Chinese fire drill, the involvement of two departmental supervisors at the bank and Mary's intercession to point out to the underwriters that I've had a decade of uninterrupted employment with the company I now have a contract with - we have the money we need. However, the paperwork is delayed in the system and we have to move the closing a couple of hours and across town to the northwest side office.

Another sales prevention department in action.

We did a 'walk through' yesterday. It was a little premature, at least from our perspective - the Monoco's are still there. Though they are packed for the most part - they are still in full 'living here' mode.

We went over the list of items and issues they'd agreed to deal with and everything looks like its in order. At least that part seems to be working right.

I'll be glad when we are quit of this place.

I have an appointment to set an appointment for a TFP shoot with Rodney, a black aspiring model living in Phoenix. We're going to try to hook up during the week of July 5th, after the move and a few minutes for us to get our feet on the ground.